In the Coracle

What God is showing me about myself at EC

February 3, 2005 // Tags: Emerging Church

Things I’ve learned about myself, or been reminded of this week:

I am odd paradox. I am as introverted as introverts can be, and yet… 3 days into this convention, I am lonely as hell. I’m so excited when I reach my family on the phone. I light up when I see people I know - Rachelle mostly, Rose last afternoon, or some of the people I’m meeting here.

I walk around with an odd mix of “I hope I don’t have to talk to anybody” and “I wish I had somebody that I knew here so I could talk to them”.

I’m trapped by the celebrity culture I hate. I’m actually afraid to go talk to Doug Pagitt and tell him how much I liked his book and am looking forward to his next two on prayer postures and sermonology. Although I felt fine talking to the crew from Harp46 tonight briefly after they blew our minds with a fantastic spoken-word-multimedia piece with Godfather McLaren.

I find myself wondering if I could write a book by next year so that I could be part of what I view as the “in” crowd.

I am incredibly judgmental, just looking for ways to create and “us” (EC) vs. “them” (NPC) attitude in my own heart. By looking at the booktables. By seeing the worship styles. By watching who dresses how, who talks in what way. I actually left a workshop last evening that had an interesting title because it was filling up with way more of “them” than “us”.

I know God led me to come here, and it’s been incredibly fruitful, but I wasn’t prepared to find out so much about my own self here.

Arrogant Bastard, indeed.

Oh God, help me. Rescue me from my self. Meet me in my dreams and in the labyrinth and in spiritual direction tomorrow.

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Introduction

Welcome! I'm Pat Loughery, and I'll be your host here. Feel free comment on what you see here. I am a lay missionary to North Bend on the east side of Seattle, a husband, dad to 2 kids, a software test manager for Equiom, Inc.,, a software consulting company. I'm also a failed and (quite possibly future) church planter and a Doctor of Ministry student with Bakke Graduate University, and usually on this blog we discuss Christian spirituality (especially of the Celtic, post-Evangelical, post-Charismatic and neo-monastic flavors), photography, motorcycles, and other oddball things.

About the Coracle

I'm trying to live a deep and relational Christian life. As I study Christian spirituality, I find the Celtic stream helpful, challenging and liveable. One of the images from early Celtic Christianity is their sea transport - the coracle.

The ancient Celts traveled in coracles - handmade, wooden framed and hide-covered boats, to journey where the trinitarian God led them. Though the transportation was simple, the journey was profound. This image is an illustration of the way I experience God's guidance - an invitation to travel with him on his paths, not mine; at his pace, not mine.

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What God is showing me about myself at EC